“Memory… is the diary that we all carry about with us.” Oscar Wilde

When the mind stores memories it thinks logically and literally, in doing so it may start to associate things, which are totally unrelated, with each other.

For instance, in the early stages of a relationship a couple may give each other gifts for no reason other than “I saw this and thought you’d like it”.  The mind then sees these gifts as a mark of affection and will associate ‘gift’ with ‘affection’.  So what happens when the gifts stop?  Does this mean that the affection is no longer there?

“I heard a definition once: Happiness is health and a short memory! I wish I’d invented it, because it is very true.” Audrey Hepburn

Deep inside the recesses of your mind your memories are stored, all the ones you can recall plus many more that you can’t.

Your unconscious mind will allow you to recall your memories as it sees fit, as your protector it may withhold access on any that may cause you any distress.  People who have suffered a trauma, such as a violent attack or disaster, may have what is referred to as dissociative amnesia where a memory is suppressed.  This can be temporary, the memory coming back in small stages, giving you time to overcome the event in parts.  For some the amnesia will be permanent, the mind will keep the memory blocked to ensure that no further distress will come of it.

It is easy to see why the mind will protect you from the memory of such traumas but what about more innocent memories, tomorrow we’ll investigate.

“Too many of us are not living our dreams because we are living our fears.” Les Brown

Our fears are a part of us, they reflect something from deep with in, but where do they come from?

The unconscious mind will collate all the information it has on a subject and decide whether it is in your best interests, this can come from anywhere, something you have seen, heard, experienced or been told directly or indirectly.  It will take into account the actions and behaviours of your peers, news stories and overheard conversations.  You will not recall many of the facts that it has stored which is why you can have a complete lack of understanding of your fears.

So what does the mind do with this information?  Tomorrow we’ll start to look deep inside.

“The further you get away from yourself, the more challenging it is. Not to be in your comfort zone is great fun.” Benedict Cumberbatch

The unconscious mind creates comfort zones from what it knows, what it’s familiar with and what it considers is in our best interests, it will then guide our conscious mind accordingly.  This is what compels some people to save and others to spend, some to eat healthily and others not to.  The comfort zone is akin to what is referred to as mindset, it is where your thoughts control your actions.

A boulder blocking your path would require you to come out of your comfort zone which can be unnerving, everything is unfamiliar, the unconscious mind does not like this and will try to get you back to what it knows.  In these instances we must persevere, continue on the unknown path, the further you go, the more your mind will accept and the easier the journey will become.

Next week I’ll be looking at what happens when your unconscious mind becomes misguided and the affects this can have.

“Adapt and overcome is my new motto.” Jack Osbourne

If you were walking along and saw a boulder blocking the path in front of you, what would you do?

Would you stop and not go any further?

Would you turn back and return from where you came?

Would you look for an alternative route?

Or would you smash through the boulder in order to continue on your way?

It is important to remember that, as we travel though life, changes will happen around us, with the world at large and our personal world, some things will be in our control but others will not and we may need to adapt.

Never stop when something blocks your path, it may be necessary to take a few steps back to consider your options, but never lose sight of your goal.  Each situation you encounter will have a different outcome, you may decide to adapt your journey, you could return to base and alter your goal or you can carry on regardless and smash your way through as originally planned.

Consider all your options and do the right thing by yourself.

“A man who views the world the same at fifty a he did at twenty has wasted thirty years of his life.” Muhammad Ali

How often do you review your opinions or plans?  Once a week?  Once a Month?  Three or four times a year?  Most of us will look at things differently when faced with new information or our circumstances change but do we give it enough consideration?

We all like to feel comfortable with our thoughts so, in our blinkered, focused state, and with the busy lives we lead, we tend to only revaluate the parts we need to, without any thought to how this affects our plans overall.  Our plans can then get disjointed and lack flow, this, in turn, can cause dissatisfaction without us understanding why.

By standing back and considering the whole picture we can streamline new views and feelings into our thoughts to compliment and integrate into our existing values and beliefs.

Zoom out, consider the situation as a whole, not just the sum of it’s parts.

“It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.” Eleanor Roosevelt

With each situation we encounter things are rarely set in stone, there are usually choices, options and/or alternatives, but sometimes we find it difficult to see them.  We get so focused on the matter in hand that we become blinkered, we only see our plans and expectations and it becomes harder to bear when the unexpected happens.

So, when unforeseen events occur what is the best way to deal with them?

This week I’ll be looking at taking a mental step back, looking at the bigger picture, and how to adapt your plans and feelings when unforeseen circumstances occur.

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” John F Kennedy

Keeping a gratitude diary is a great way to close the day on a positive note.  You can buy special gratitude diaries with helpful hints and tips and instructions, you can use a conventional diary or just a note book.

There are different ways of using it, but how ever you decide begin with ’Today I am thankful for…’, or ‘Today I am grateful for…..’.

One way to use it is to think back over your day, what good things have happened to you or been around you?  Write them all down then consider them individually, is there one which stands out?  Another way is to use it in the same way as affirmations and bring things you want into the present.

You can write about people, places, material things, feelings, emotions, anything you want, there are no rules on subject, it is your diary and your thoughts.  The only rules are the same as with affirmations, write in the present, use positive words and make it about things you want.

Why not start one tonight?

“It’s the repetition of Affirmations that leads to belief. And once that belief becomes a deep conviction, things begin to happen.” Muhammad Ali

Every day we use thousands of keywords and the unconscious mind needs to workout a system of importance.  It does this very logically by how each one is used and how often, it is, therefore, relatively easy to reprogram.

So, if you want to stop eating chocolate, pies, cakes etc. and want to start eating more healthily, what’s the best way to do it?

Start by focusing on what you want, healthy eating, the healthy foods that you want to eat, be realistic, focus on the healthy foods you like.

Every day bring healthy food into you thoughts in as many different ways as you can, if you read an article on healthy eating you will see, read and internally hear the words.  When you discuss healthy eating with friends you will not only speak and be spoken to, but you will hear the words internally and externally.  Even a text to a friend would count as the written word.

Now at some point the bad foods will come up, but as long as healthy eating and good foods are in the vast majority the unconscious mind will overlook them.

Read back on this blog, how often have the good words appeared against the bad?

“Words do two major things: They provide food for the mind and create light for understanding and awareness.”
- Jim Rohn

The unconscious mind is very logical and will focus on the keywords of what you hear, see, speak and write, it won’t recognise the difference between positive and negative, this is why we must always focus on what we want.

‘I mustn’t forget’ and “I must remember’ say exactly the same thing to the conscious mind, but the unconscious will not register must or mustn’t, the keywords are forget and remember, which do you think will best help you post a letter?

Think about what it is you want and make sure your keywords reflect it.